I Know Such a Woman

I recently read “Three Cups of Tea” by Greg Mortenson and ran across three passages where the subject is Mortenson's wife, Tara, that really hit home...

From Chapter 22:

“How many women would have the strength and vision to let the father of their children work in such a dangerous place for months at a time?…Tara not only allows it, but supports it, because she believes so strongly in Greg's mission. If that’s not heroism I don't know what is.”

I agree. I know such a woman.

From Chapter 23 where Mortenson is trying to stay out of a firefight:

“I stopped thinking about escape and started thinking about my kids…trying to imagine how Tara would explain the way I'd died to them, and wondering if they would understand what I was trying to do  how I didn't mean to leave them over here. I decided Tara would make them understand. And that was a pretty good feeling.” 

I understand. I know such a woman.

And, finally, from the Acknowledgements:

“Most of all, I owe immeasurable gratitude to my incredible wife, Tara. I'm glad we took a leap of faith together. You are an amazing companion, confidante, mother, and friend. In my frequent absences over the…years of our marriage…your love has made it possible for me to follow my heart.. I love you.”

I know – I also love such a woman.

And 21 years ago she became my wife, only asking for my love, not seeking guarantees of prosperity or security. Willing to walk with me wherever our Lord and our lives would take us. Making it possible for me to follow my heart in following my Lord and His calling, a prototypical military/ministry wife.

Happy Mother’s Day, Anne.

I'll echo Mortenson's testimony to the rarity of such women. I've seen too much of life to ignore those who got going when the going got tough.

I was already in the Navy when she married me, and already stationed too far from home. She had to wait four months after the honeymoon to even be able to catch up with me in Japan. Later, she released me for military service in two combat zones at times when no one was sure what was coming next. The second time with two small children at home and us stationed in a foreign country.

And, of course, there were all the times both military and ministry when someone asked, “Can we borrow your husband for a bit?”

As a pastor, I hear about too many ministry families where that pastor does everything he can to duck the inevitable emergency phone calls because it will only cause trouble with a wife who thinks her “white-collar professional” husband should only work 9-5. When the phone rings like that at our house, this "woman God gave me" has clothes laid out and my stuff ready before I’m off the phone.

She walked readily with me into the unknown country of Parkinson’s Disease, sure that God would somehow resolve this blazing furnace, knowing that “the God we serve is able to save us from it, and he will rescue us… But even if He does not…"

And I could go on, talking about how she’s swallowed her concerns and let me spend time in homeless camps (sending food along from her pantry, trusting that God would make it up) and on missions trips; freed me for racetrack chaplaincy and the extra time it took to attempt bilingual preaching…

How she’s thrown herself into ensuring that even the most underfunded weddings were made the most of (more faith from her grocery budget). Sending me to hospitals and funerals and all kinds of other time-with-the-family draining events – even when it had to have made her feel like a de facto single parent – because it’s what we do.

And how now, once again, she’s faithfully walking with me into this time of sickness and disability and lost income. Taking on the burden of watching over the kids, running our household, driving us all where we need to go, and generally keeping track of me.

Not to mention that she’s an “eyes on the prize” “worth far more than rubies” woman of faith who remembers (most of the time) that this all doesn’t matter anyhow ‘cause she’s just passing through on her way to that City God is building for us.

So what does all that have to do with Mothers Day, you ask?

Wouldn’t you want your children to have such a woman for their mother?